You are so right to feel the way you do. I know I had ideas of what my life as a mom would look like. I came from a family of fertile Myrtles and NO ONE of my aunts (whom I took so much after in every other way)ever experienced any troubles with having children. So, when we had one and then two devastating miscarriages I began to reevaluate what happiness would look like to me. I remember holding out Nat in my arms and how precious she was (and still is of course) to me because I had almost given up hope that that day would ever actually come. Then two years later - another blessing. Now Dmitry. I have to admit, I wonder if we could be so 'lucky' a second time and then I feel instantly ashamed because I know that with the God that I serve 'luck' has nothing to do with it! I know that if He wanted to, He could give me 100 more kids just as wonderful as Dmitry. I don't say this to take anything away from my dear sweet son but just to make a point that even that task would not be impossible for Him. Yet, He is all about timing and what is best for us and the older I get the more I surprised I am to learn just how little I know about what I truly need (and sometimes what I really want). I am such a fan of Iilya. I have a hard time imagining 'lightening striking twice in one place' and yet I know too (as you said in your post) that if God wanted to and when God wanted to... nothing could hold Him back from blessing you again with an equally awesome kiddo! I think you all are such awesome parents that I can't help but to pray that He does (at LEAST once more)!

it's almost never how we plan "it" to be... being content with God driving the roads we travel is the BEST.

thank you for sharing this post, it puts my attitude in place today.

Oh Melissa, I think we all as women/wives/moms go through our future plans over and over in our minds/dreams. First, we think about our future husband. Then, it is our wedding. Finally, we think about our families. We think about the perfect time to have children, how many children, their names, and separation in ages. I don't think any of us can predict God's plan. Like you, I think the blessings come in the unknowns when we figure out how great God has been in his plans for our lives. And, you are still a young mother in today's world. We are mid 30's with two little ones and I too still dream of another. Many women are having children or adopting into their 40's, so you have plenty of time to save and plan for 2...3...or 4 children!! Just have faith. God will work it out.

Many Blessings.

I never thought I'd have two girls spaced out nine years apart. Or be in grad school and pregnant at 35. Definitely NOT my plan!! God's not finished with you and Nate yet, I know it.

Smooch the boy for me and tell him that Aunt KiKi says hello!! love you, Kristy

I understand where you're coming from completely...and I'm 37 and hubby is 45. This year I wondered when a second child would enter our lives...especially since the well is dry. It's likely that Alexander will be our only child, and I am completely fine with that. Took a long while to accept this concept and it's really OK. Like you said, things HAD to go a certain way in order for us to get these great little boys. If a second child is in the cards, then we have to let things go the same route. Would be nice to know ahead of time, of course.

I follow your blog on a link from Carey's blog (one of my children is from the same orphanage as Carey's daughter). I just had to comment - what you said was so beautifully written. I do hope that one day you will have another child (if that is God's will). Based on your posts, you are such an incredible mother and your son is so lucky to have you in his life.

Ten years ago, I would have never imagined that I would be married, let alone have 2 older boys that we adopted from Russia. Trust me, our recent adoption from Vladivostok was so much more expensive than our first adoption from Tver(by a long shot!).

Best wishes to you!

Myra

I just wrote a blog entry about our timetable vs Gods today on my blog :) coincidence! I just began reading your blog as we are starting our adoption journey as well!

Hey, we are 45 with SIX (ages 5 to 18)! Believe me,the Lord will provide all the energy you need should you adopt later. There are soooo many needy children and we have even mentioned that we might even do it again. God Bless -