Have you? I have. Today, in fact.

You know...I had a huge, long blogpost written out, and for some reason, I couldn't really get into posting it. It may be because I am not completely comfortable bearing my soul for everyone to look at me critically. Or maybe it was because I just didn't feel like my thoughts were very coherent and I just don't want to post something that makes me seem like I'm babbling.

But the bottom line of my post was that I had a very long day. I was tired to the point of not even being able to smile. My brain is on overload, and I've been feeling like I am just running around in circles with all the thoughts swarming around in my head -- thoughts about ideas for this grant at work, and thoughts about school, and thoughts about when we will be able to see Little I again (today, he turns 17 months old, and the longer we are away, the more it breaks my heart to think about being gone so long). I just have lots to think about, and so much to accomplish in such little time!

And then, driving home, I noticed that my gas gauge was sitting pretty close to E. I pushed the handy button that can tell me how many miles I've got till I'm stranded, and the above picture was what I saw. Literally. I took the picture, and felt a blog post coming on.

But really what I saw was a comparison between myself and the gas tank in my car. This week, my stress level has gone pretty high...and I've become more impatient to see my baby boy again. Along with the stress comes worry (yes, that "w" word, coming back)...and both stress and worry completely sap me and leave me pretty close to E.

But then again,... I also got to thinking about how good I really have it - last week, a family at church lost one of their precious children...then, in the same week, the VA Tech shooting happened. We hear about so many horrible things happening in the world. There are adoptive parents who have been waiting longer than a year to go back and bring their children home. How can I compare my impatience and frustration with the frustration, hurt and devastation other people are going through? Simply? I can't. Especially when these people handle such tragedies with such grace and faith.

You know what we all have in common though? You know what helps people who have a much worse situation than we do? We all have a God that is faithful to those who call upon Him. He has a perfect timing and He answers prayers according to that timing. The answers may not be exactly what we have in mind, but we should still ask and know that He will answer...and give us comfort when we need it.

And we can take heart in knowing that His presence is with us.

So...I took my car to the gas station, and the gas tank is now full. According to the estimate, I've got close to 300 miles before I have to refill. What about me, though? With prayer, and the idea of "letting go" I can feel myself being refilled again. But I need to make sure to refill every day, not just when I get stressed and completely overwhelmed. Call it preventative medicine, if you will. But I know ... it works.

You have made known to me the ways of life; You will make me FULL OF GLADNESS WITH YOUR PRESENCE. -Psalm 16:11